Back To The Drawing Board

Yesterday I met with the recurrent miscarriage specialist. I met with a different doctor than I saw at my last appointment and at my private appointment. He was nice, spent a little more time with me going through all questions and my slides. He got a little off topic at times talking about how humans were the most infertile mammals of all species, um I guess that's useful knowledge?

Going through my x-ray he was, much to my shock, absolutely adamant that I don't have a septum or even a partial septum. I questioned the use of HSG to diagnose the difference between an arcuate uterus and a partial septum he said perhaps if the HSG isn't taken correctly if would be difficult to tell but he assured me that the technician who gives the x-ray is the best. And from the slides he could see with no doubt in his mind that my uterus is normal so no need for a hysteroscopy. I also tested negative to Lupus so all the blood tests except for the chromosome test have come back and are normal. We won't get the chromosome test back probably for another few weeks. I gave blood for Factor V Leiden tests and was told to start trying again after my next cycle.

To say that I was more than a little shocked is an understatement. I suppose I should be grateful that everything is seemingly normal but obviously worried that we are no closer to finding any concrete answers and therefore concrete solutions. As happy as I am to go forward I feel a little like a tightrope walker performing without a net.

If the Factor V Leiden test comes back as positive apparently its treated with heparin and baby aspirin which they would then put me on as soon as I find out if I am pregnant. They'll also check I think at least one of the thrombosis tests again as levels change during pregnancy. Also I qualify for a test group to be given early progesterone which means I might get progesterone or I might just get a placebo. At the moment this RPL clinic doesn't believe in the benefits of progesterone treatment for early miscarriage as its "closing the barn door after the horse has run out" but I guess that there is significant evidence from other clinics that they are looking at it again so it can't hurt, might help or might be more of nothing. I also asked about NK cells and apparently they don't believe in those either and therefore don't test for them.

I'm going to go back to acupuncture and talk to my acupuncturist about alternative treatments. I've also started reading the Infertility Cure by Randine Lewis which is very similar to The Baby Bible in its philosophies and Eastern/ Western approach. Its about taking things into your own hands as well which I guess at this point I need to if my doctors can't seem to find anything to help me and tell me I need to get my confidence back and saddle up! (No, I'm not exaggerating this was my doctor's parting advice). Although both books are mostly geared towards women who can't get pregnant my thought is that recurrent early miscarriage must have its roots in some of the same problems, implantation and poor egg quality both of which lead to early embryonic demise and must be one or both of my problems. Unless its a mind/ body problem, or how about stress? Maybe I just need to learn to relax? Says the woman who has taken off six months from work and is ready to give a black eye to anyone who kindly suggests she is anything other than completely and utterly zen. I have earned my patience through this muddled minefield and I know that it will come in handy once we finally do become parents. Sigh.